finally willing to write the will

Friends have hounded me, common sense has niggled at me so finally I've written a will.  I felt closer to doing this and closer to death at age fourteen. Actually, aged thirteen as I had decided I would not last past fourteen. The cut-off year for a tomboy who took so  many physical chances in daylight with the scraped knees and torn clothes to prove it. The cut-off year for a girl who never slept,  who dreaded the darkness and feared the shadow in the doorway of her bedroom.

My treasures at that age were a huge flashlight which I kept under my pillow, seashells from Watch Hill, a cow's leg bone I found on the farm, a wasp's nest in nearly perfect condition (just one tear), a dog's jawbone with 7 teeth and a rattlesnake skin.  The first artifacts for my museum which has yet to be built.  I still have everything but the flashlight. Mother saved it all in a gold Neiman Marcus box and I opened it forty years later, looked up at the sky and thanked her. 

Now, writing my will, after a lifetime of collecting all sorts of things--an alabaster vase from Egypt, an ivory carving from the Congo, paintings, closets of clothes, books, and all my notebooks filled with thoughts--I realize that my treasures aren't anyone else's treasures.  No one will ever love that cow's leg the way I do.  I suppose all we really leave behind --those of us who refused to procreate---is a wispy memory of a late-night conversation or a fizzy love affair or a long, hilarious lunch in Rome.  That is what I'd like to bestow upon pink smoke in colored bottles to open AT WILL and to smile and remember me.



Memorial Day: Women in the Civil War

Yes, let's remember every person who fought in war and hope it was for something they believed in. I recently read of women who secretly fought to fight.  

In the 1860's, some women bound their breasts so that they could wear Confederate and Union uniforms. They joined the ranks alongside the men, learned to do what had to be done in private, and soldiered on.  When or if discovered, they were sent away OR hailed as heroines.

Belle Boyd was a Confederate spy for Stonewall Jackson and Frances Clayton pretended to be a Union soldier, gambling and smoking cigars under the name Jack Williams.

The Library Company of Philadelphia has purchasd books and artifacts relating to female soldiers. Loreta Janeta Velazquez impersonated a Confederate lieutenant.  She wrote in her memoir: "I made quite as good-looking a man as my husband."



Terrific discussion on MSNBC's  Morning Joe this week with Mica Brezinski discussing her new book of that name.

Tina Brown, Leslie Stahl and several other high-powered women discussing women's need to be liked as opposed to being respected. Negotiating skills. Men are the risk-takers and women told as children, "don't go out too far"---I picture a little girl in shallow water and a little boy diving through a breaker. Men see money as power, women see money as security. Much to think about, to fight to change!

Women in the U.S. still earn 77 cents for every dollar a man earns.


should I confess.....

to looking at the clock at five minutes to four and feeling ......ODD? The first day without Oprah. Without flipping the show on as background to filing or typing up an invoice.  I confess that sometimes I stopped  everything and grabbed a Coke Zero and really listened to a guest describe something I was entirely unaware of in life.  I won't be alone in missing her.


DSK to be prosecuted by women....

The lead prosecutors in the Manhattan sexual assault case against Dominique Strauss-Kahn were named: Joan Illuzzi-Orbon and Ann P. Prunty. 

Bright, highly respected women in the DA's office, a very powerful man and a hotel maid from Guinea forced to perform oral sex in a hotel room....I must ask:

Have we come a long way, baby??